“To please God…to be a real ingredient in the divine happiness… to be loved by God, not merely pitied, but delighted in as an artist delights in his work or a father in a son - it seems impossible, a weight or a burden of glory which our thoughts can hardly sustain. But so it is.”

C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory


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Most of us have standards for ourselves which are both impossibly high and yet shallow at the same time. We then attack ourselves for not being “perfect” in some way that won’t even matter in five years. Those attacks become habits and those habitual criticisms create a false self image inside ourselves. We think we’re not good enough because we don’t meed standards that are based on false expectations.

Be watchful of your thoughts- guarding your mind so ugly thoughts about yourself don’t become comfortable ruts that you stay in, over and over, until you’re stuck. Get out of the rut of false expectations and criticizing yourself for shallow failures.

Part of healing from this is accepting reality- your strengths, your weaknesses, the parameters of your situation. Another step in changing this cycle is replacing the negative thoughts with new thoughts.

Let the Jesus prayer be your “go to” thought.

Lord Jesus Christ have mercy upon me a sinner.

Be brave, be humble, just pray and let yourself be authentic with your Creator. Is that scary? He knows that authentic you and loves you.

You are a work in progress, slowly being transformed into His image.That authentic you is a beautiful child of God.


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We try to understand ourselves with labels:

I’m an artist.

I’m an introvert.

I’m …not sure who I am.

I’m not enough.

We are like the blindfolded person trying to understand what an elephant is by feeling its toes. There’s so much more to us than we can comprehend in this life.

We feel confused because we can’t understand ourselves. Maybe we spend too much time trying to understand ourselves and giving ourselves psychological name tags - many of which actually limit us.

These things may be part of us, I may be shy, I may have artistic talent, and I may also be confused about where I fit in, but the heart of who I am is a child of God. I am an eternal being created by a God who loves me.

Let yourself unfold in the safety of God’s love, not with the shallowness of the world’s labels.

Our identity comes from being created in God’s image. When we look at Him and when we struggle to become more like Him, who we are becomes more natural for us.

Let Christ, the One who created you and knows your heart, be the foundation for understanding your identity.

We have eternal value...

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God created each of us to live forever, to be eternal. Noe one is a mistake. No one is unwanted in His eyes. Each of us has beauty and value in His love. Don’t forget that. When it’s hard to love yourself, let go of trying and remember that He loves you- scripture says He has lavished love on you! When it’s hard to love others, try to see them through His eyes. Every person has eternal value and is precious in the eyes of God.

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are …. I John 3:1